Being a Grown Up

There are certain points in a person’s life when you realize you’re really a grown up. One of these is when you walk across a stage to get that all-important piece of paper. Another is when you hold your child for the first time. However, the most recent one I’ve experienced is maybe the most terrifying yet: the REALITY CHECK.

Let me back up first. This time a year ago, I had just moved to Italy, five months pregnant, and was planning the next year of my life. Everything went basically according to plan, except for one thing. In this year, I was to decide what I wanted to do with my life, and how to achieve that. As you know, if you’ve read my blog before, I’ve had a million ideas over the past year. My problem is not ideas; it’s how to fund these ideas. Which brings me to where I am now. The REALITY CHECK. What does this consist of, you ask? Well, it’s the simple realization that money does not, in fact, grow on trees, and that as valiant as my entrepreneurial efforts were, I’m going to have to suck it up and get a real job. Whew. It took me a year to get there. Finally, about five days ago, I realized this, and have since been frantically searching for full-time jobs.

I wanted to stay home with Ale, but the more I tossed ideas around, the more I realized it wasn’t going to happen. People do occasionally happen upon these jobs to do from home that pay well, but to be honest, most of them just offer supplemental income. Since over the next year and a half, Paolo will be staying in Europe finishing his degree, I need more than a supplemental income. That was the second part of my REALITY CHECK.

By now, I have gotten over the shock of my realization, and am fine with it. I am hoping to find a job in sales, as these are really the only jobs that are appealing to me. Sorry, but “Financial Analyst” or something like that isn’t my cup of tea. It’s actually Paolo’s cup of tea, so different strokes for different folks. I have applied for several jobs that really interest me, and hopefully one of these will work out, although the whole being abroad thing isn’t doing me any favors. I would ask that you please keep me in your thoughts and prayers during this time, as I’m majorly freaking out over the whole thing. I’m not sure why; it’s not like my family will throw us out on the street, I just really want to start adding money to the bank, not just subtracting.


By the way, we are all doing fine here. Ale is growing and changing so much; this tiny apartment can hardly contain him! We have a friend from Nice coming to visit this weekend, so that will be great!

Ciao for now,

Kathleen

The Mystery of Italy

I thought last year that people in Italy were old fashioned and ridiculous, but let me tell you.. I had no idea. It’s one thing to be here and be just a young girl, but a young girl with a baby? You’ll get advice and worries from anyone and everyone on things you never thought one could worry about. For example, earlier I was downstairs in the apartment building, waiting for Paolo to come down, and the landlord told me to be careful with Ale, because there was some wind coming through the door. I mean, WHAT? Do babies die from wind these days? Actually, it’s super hot here; probably the poor, sweaty child would like a little wind. I mean, really. Just really. And have mercy, I could write a Part 2 to my previous air-conditioning post. They literally think air-conditioning will make you sick. Personally, I think laying in a pool of sweat, trying to sleep can’t be terribly healthy, but that’s just me.


    That stuff aside, all is well here. Ale is growing up so much; just since we’ve been in Italy, he’s started sitting up, sleeping in his own bed (mostly), quasi-crawling, and even supported walking!! He’s so very sweet and curious. Beach time with him has been interesting; it’s no more relaxing to go to the beach. In fact, we don’t even go every day just because it’s kind of a hassle. We do go on lotsssss of walks though. I now know why Europeans spend $500+ on strollers; it’s like a car for them.
    I have a new business idea that I’ve been exploring. I still want to do the tea shop, but I just don’t have the capital for it now, so I’m going to start smaller by making cakes to order from my home.  Italian cakes, to be exact. So I’ve started learning and practicing, which has been both delicious and frustrating. I’ve pretty much got crostatas down at this point, which is like an jam tart, but very versatile. Today I tried a profiterole cake, which was nothing short of a disaster. That one is going to take a bit more work. So Cullmanites, get ready. When I return, I’m going to be a baking machine. I’m also looking for a nannying job, so let me know if you know someone who needs one, please!

    One thing I’ve always wondered about Italians is how they manage to stay so thin. They have such great food, I just don’t get it. The obesity rate here is 10%, while America’s is about 35%. What are they doing here?? I’ve been pleasantly surprised to find that I’ve lost about 5 pounds since I got here, which brings me to my pre-pregnancy weight. At home, I was working out almost every day, with little to no results. But then I come here, feast on pizza, pasta, and so many cakes, and I lose weight. What is this phenomenon? For sure I walk a lot, and I’ve also been swimming, but I just don’t know. I would say it was the quality of food, but I eat pretty well at home too, so I’m not sure that it’s terribly different. However, I would recommend an extended vacation in Italy if you just can’t get rid of those last few pounds.

Ciao for now,

Kathleen

Summertime

Whew! It’s been a busy month. I’m going to keep using that as my excuse for why I don’t write more often. I’m starting to eat my words about how I didn’t know how a baby could take so much time. It seems that in some ways they take more time as they get older.

Ale is six months old now, almost seven actually.. time is going too fast! He’s mobile, as in he rolls like crazy, and also does this weird pivoting, quasi-crawling thing. Basically, he can get where he wants to get. We’ve had our first accident; he fell off my bed the morning of his baby dedication at church. I turned my back for a few seconds, and he took full advantage of that time. It was a bit tramatic, but we’ve moved on.



Paolo’s been back with us for almost a month now, and we’re actually back in Italy since Thursday. How was a international flight with a six month old, you ask? Not bad, actually. The preparation, security, etc., was more stressful than the flight itself. He slept a lot, and was overall fairly pleasant on our completely full flight. I slept not at all, and suffered greatly the next day. As soon as we arrived, Paolo had a full day planned of who we would visit, and it included several towns. That night we crashed, and Ale and I slept for about 12 hours. It was magical.

It’s nice to be back here, although I do miss my family. I also was quickly reminded of the air conditioning situation, which I forgot after living in the North Pole (dad keeps the house on 68 always). Going from the North Pole to sticky, sweaty indoor heat is miserable. However, we left Friday for the beach, and will be here most of the summer, so no worries; the weather is better, and there’s air conditioning!!!  Ale is loving being at the beach; it takes all my energy to make sure he doesn’t roll away and get sand in his mouth. He went swimming for the first time yesterday and loved it, although he wasn’t super impressed yet by his float. He seems to be jealous now of how much older people can do, and is a bit frustrated by his skills. Which as I speak, he’s “walking” across the room (holding hands). He’s not terribly interested in sitting, which may be because his head is so heavy to hold up, or may be just because he’s more interested in standing. He moves so much, it’s hard to hold himself up while sitting. He’s too busy, ain’t nobody got time for that.

Now that I’m an “immigrant” again, hopefully I’ll have more writing time, so look for more updates!


Ciao for now,

Kathleen

Surprised by Joy

The title of my blog is not actually in reference to C.S. Lewis’ book, although I do intend to read it (when I get some time to read). I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how life was about a year ago. I was graduating from college, which for me was kind of an anti-climatic experience. It was kind of overshadowed by the fact that I was also about 10 weeks pregnant.

Finding out you’re pregnant, whether you planned to be or not, is always a scary thing, I think. If you were trying to be pregnant, then you are suddenly faced with the reality of it. If it’s unplanned, it’s a whole new ballgame. You are suddenly faced with every emotion possible, and so many decisions. I don’t mean the decision on what to do with the baby, that was never a question for me; I think it’s more deciding how you’re going to go forward.

I won’t go into the details, but Alessandro was truly a miracle. All babies are, but some really beat the odds. When I found out I was pregnant, it seemed so impossible that I thought if it was true, then it must be something really special. I won’t lie, and say that made all the scariness of the situation go away, it just helped. Sometimes I’m still scared; I don’t know where I’m going to be this time next year.  But things are coming together, slowly but surely.

More than anything, I wish I could tell my last-year self that not only was everything going to be ok, but that this little baby was going to open a whole new world for me. I haven’t been this truly happy or fullfilled in a very long time, if ever. I’m not saying that motherhood is the end all of everything, but for me, it’s pretty spectacular. I never thought I would find so much joy just in watching a baby play with his feet, or make funny noises. I had grand plans to travel the globe and do all sorts of things- I still will, just with a child in tow. This time last year, I thought any excitement in my life was over, and that I would just become a boring, old person.

For sure it’s not the same as before. But the thing is, it’s better! I can’t go out on Friday nights and stay out late, or come and go quite so easily, but it turns out that cuddling with Ale while watching a movie, or going on walks with him is so much more wonderful. 

Before, I didn’t know what pure joy was, and that has been the biggest (and best) surprise I’ve gotten from motherhood.


Ciao for now,
Kathleen

Rainy Day Ramblings

I know it’s been a while, but the things is, I just don’t write well unless I’m in the mood for it, or have some inspiration. My forced writings are never as good. That was always my issue with school papers, as well. I hate being given a topic that’s boring; then I’ll never feel like writing it.


Anyways, it’s been very busy lately. Last time I wrote, I was with my grandma in Tennessee. I stayed there for a couple weeks, then came back here in time for Paolo’s visit, and it seems like things haven’t slowed down since. We had a great visit, but of course, not long enough. He’s coming back in a week and a half though, so not as long this time. I won’t get to go out to San Francisco after all, unfortunately. It just got to be too expensive, with flight, hotel, etc. Not to mention that traveling with a four month is probably not that easy, if I have to guess. Even car rides are not as easy now; he won’t just sleep the whole time like he used to.



However, Alessandro is getting sweeter and sweeter every day. He laughs, he plays, he babbles; so sweet! He started eating oatmeal a couple weeks ago, and bananas this week, which he looooooooves! I, however, do not love the diaper that comes the next morning. But as long as he’s happy. He’s even sleeping better at night. During the day, not so much. He’ll cat-nap, but only in someone’s arms. The second his head hits the bed, he’s awake. It’s so hard to get anything done! I like co-sleeping at night, but I can’t just nap all day.. any suggestions? I don’t want to do the whole crying-it-out thing, but he does need to learn to go to sleep on his own.


Also in the past month, I’ve come up with a business idea. I’m currently writing a business plan, and hope to find financing when I get back from Italy in September. My idea is for a cafe that specializes in tea. I went to a similar place in Collierville, where my grandma lives, and it was (in my opinion, at least), such a great idea. It’s not really a tearoom, like where ladies lunch and such, but more like a cafe, but with tea instead of coffee. I’ve always preferred tea, so it was just perfect to me. If you live/lived in Cullman, take my survey concerning the business, please!

http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/7XSJ5S7

Oh, and I’m happy to report that my new cloth diapers are wonderful. They were inexpensive, and very effective. I’ve already ordered more! They’re called Sunbabies, and if you’re interested in cloth diapering, I would definitely recommend them (so far).

That’s about it for now, not a lot else going on! I’ll try to feel inspired to write more often in the future :)




Ciao for now,

Kathleen

Diaper Woes

The average cost of diapering a child for 2 1/2 years is from $1500-2000. Yeah, you heard right. Literally thousands of dollars for crap. That’s the main reason I decided last summer that I would cloth diaper instead. I spent $120 for 24 prefold diapers, 4 Thirsties diaper covers, and one stink-free wet bag to hold the dirties. So I thought I was really beating the system.

Umm, let’s just say... NO. I started using them when Ale was about 10 days old. By that point, I’d been spoiled by the convenience of disposables. But alas, I wouldn’t let myself buy more, so we proceeded with the cloth. It took a while to get down how to fold them, and fasten them while Ale was squirming (had to use plain safety pins; Italy doesn’t do cloth diapers). It wasn’t easy. But we figured it out eventually. Then I noticed that every time I changed him, he was soaking wet. I came to the conclusion that it was sweat, and poor baby got a rash. Ugh. So I changed him about twice as often as normal, which was fine except for at night. After being told by my mom that it wasn’t normal to have to change diapers all night long, we switched to disposables for nighttime. So we did actually do mostly cloth for the first six weeks.

HOWEVER. When I got back to the US, I found that I had been gifted many diapers. So I’ve gotten spoiled again. I’ve still kept cloth diapering some, but Ale grew so fast that I had to immediately use any newborn and size 1 diapers I had been given. Now it’s all good, so I’ve been trying to unspoil myself, but for real, I just hate those cloth diapers. I started researching and it seems that I picked the most complicated, cheapo method of cloth diapering, so I’ve now ordered my second batch, and this time they will be pocket diapers, which basically means they’re all one piece except an absorbent piece you stuff in the middle. But they’re not here yet, so the verdict is still out. They are super cute though! I was going to just keep on with the others until the new ones arrive, but earlier this week as I was changing an overly wet diaper, I noticed they were also really tight on Ale’s chubby thighs, so I just bought a big box of disposables. Whatever. I’m trying to be earth and budget conscious, but I’m taking a break for now. And also, I realized Target puts diapers on clearance, so I got a case of Luv's for only $12, which is great.

By the way, the laundry is not that bad. I’ve heard people complain about the laundry aspect of cloth diapering, but I don’t find it that awful. In Italy, I didn’t even have a dryer, and we still made it work. I will say that they require special care, so you should know that before you start (because I didn’t). Hopefully these new diapers will be more convenient and absorbent, because I so hate spending money on something so stupid. It’s like buying toilet paper or gas; something you have to use, but it just seems like money not going towards shoes. Or cute baby clothes.

Speaking of which, Paolo thinks I have a shopping problem. But seriously, I have been finding such great clearance lately. Alessandro better fit into each size when he’s supposed to or I’m going to have some nice clothes with no one to wear them. My proudest moment was last week in Macy’s when I bought 4 Carter’s pajamas, two outfits for him next year, and a sweater for me, all for $31!! Now that’s the kind of shopping that you’re being wasteful if you don’t buy it. Right?

In other news, Alessandro rolled over this week! And now he’s a rolling machine! I was snapping up his back buttons earlier and he rolled before I could even finish! He’s so funny now, really coming into his own. He’s grabbing everything and putting it straight in his mouth. But no, he still doesn’t sleep through the night. I don’t even care any more. I spent a while agonizing over that, but now we’ve worked out a kind of routine, and it’s working, so that’s all I can ask for. He’s sleeping now, as a matter of fact. Not in my arms! That’s quite a feat!  It’s really the little things...



Ciao for now,

Kathleen

Three Month Update

Guys, time is flying! Alessandro is three months old now! He’s almost rolling over and trying so hard to sit up.. what happened to my little baby? In the past couple days, he’s discovered how loudly he can “talk”, so that’s been really fun (something I’ll regret saying in a couple months, probably!).

We’ve been busy this week; Saturday we went to Auburn for a weekend visit, and then we came straight to Collierville, TN to stay with my grandma for a while. He did wonderfully on the car rides, as usual. He has really turned into a happy baby, and is just so much fun! I don’t know for sure, but I think it’s partly because he’s already been dragged along on so many adventures that he’s pretty flexible and easy-going. I mean, he had his first international flight at six weeks. He’s pretty adaptive! He’s also playing on his own now, which is great for me! He was having to be held all the time, but in the past couple weeks, he’s been enjoying laying out on his playmat or on his Boppy and looking at and grabbing toys, which also gives me some free time!

I’ve gotten a lot of questions about my future plans, so I thought I’d give a tentative outline in this post. I’m staying with my parents until June 19 while Paolo is out in San Francisco for his semester. He’ll be coming here in a couple weeks for a visit, and then in May when his school lets out. We (Alessandro and I) are also most likely going out there at the end of April, which I’m really excited about!  Anyways, June 19, we’re flying back to Italy to spend the summer there, at the beach. The complicated thing about an international baby is that everyone wants to see him! I wish the whole family could be in one place so it wasn’t going to be so back and forth, but it will probably never be that way. So, after the summer, probably in September, there are several courses of action we could take, but that remains to be seen! The most likely seems to be that I’ll come back to the US to find a big girl job while Paolo finishes school, so that stinks that we’ll be apart, but at some point, I guess I have to work.

Speaking of work, I’ve decided I would really like to pursue a career in writing. I’ve been floundering back and forth over the past couple years, and have considered everything from opening a restaurant to working in sales. But most of all, I would like to write. Especially since writing this blog, people have been telling me that’s what I should do, and I’m starting to think there may be something to it. But I have to find a way! And also, I don’t want to write books. I don’t have the attention span or desire to do that. That’s why I love blogging; it’s to the point, and I can do it when I feel the urge to do it, without having to have a flow with previous posts. So maybe a newspaper or magazine column would be ideal for me. If you have any advice on how to go about doing something like this, let me know, please! I think a blog is a great first step, so if you like my blog, follow me and/or share it, please, please, please!



Not only would writing be something I would enjoy, but it would give me the flexibility hopefully to stay home with my bebe more. I never thought I would want to be a stay-at-home mom, but pigs seem to be flying. I’ve been so blessed that both my parents and Paolo’s parents have given me the opportunity to spend time with Ale instead of working, but it won’t last forever, so I really want a job that still allows me the maximum time with him. I know, I want it all, right? Well, I’m going to try my best, so maybe in the next few months, I’ll have some happy future news!

Ciao for now,

Kathleen