Sitting, Waiting, Wishing

If you couldn’t guess, yes, I am still pregnant. 39 weeks and 2 days pregnant, to be exact. I know it’s not actually even my due date yet, but I’m mad at the doctor for getting my hopes up and telling me it would probably be early. I need him to come this week both for my sanity, and because of the extensive amount of paperwork a dual citizen baby requires, including our appointment at the American embassy on December 12. So Alessandro, please hurry!!

Once again, not a lot going on here. It’s gotten to the point in the year in Italy where it always looks like it’s going to rain, if it’s not actually raining, and is apparently cold, although one benefit of being pregnant is that cold means nothing to me. In a way, I’m glad the weather is this way; if it was beautiful out, I would feel worse about not really being able to enjoy it. But I’m still going a bit stir-crazy. I did go out yesterday with Paolo, and discovered that the Christmas markets have started in the city center, so that was really cute and cozy. Outdoor markets are one thing that never cease to enthrall me, and I wish we had more of them in the US! Somehow it’s much easier to empty your pockets when you’re outside enjoying a hot cinnamon roll, strolling from booth to booth.

Anyways, I kept meaning to write about this magical product that I found here in Italy, but haven’t yet, so here we go. The product is an epilator, and its purpose is hair removal. I’ve heard of an epilator before, but didn’t actually know what it was; now I can’t understand why it’s not more popular in the US. It’s basically an electronic device that has a roll-top with multiple tweezers. Mine has 40 tweezers, actually. It pulls the hair out by the root, essentially like tweezers, but much faster than tweezing your hairs one by one. Which I know, sounds very painful. It does hurt the first couple times, especially in sensitive areas, like behind the knees or the ankles, but it’s just a slight sting. When used properly, you only have to do it once every 2-4 weeks, depending on how fast your hair grows. I’ve had to do it more lately, because I have this irrational fear of going into labor when I have visible leg hairs, and let’s face it, I can’t even see part of my legs at this point, no matter how much I twist and turn. But seriously, every girl should get one! It’s so nice not to think about shaving, and so much more economical than waxing. Mine cost about 50 euros ($65), and is supposed to last for 5 years. Even if you use cheap disposable razors, over 5 years, an epilator is cheaper! Here’s a link to the one I have; I highly recommend it!
http://www.amazon.com/Braun-SE-5280-Epilator-Glove/dp/B004QI8UJK/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1353937036&sr=8-1&keywords=silk+epil+5

And also, here is my recipe of the week, which I mentioned in my last post. 

Molten Chocolate Cake

3 eggs
1 stick butter
1 3/4 cups sugar
1 cup flour
1/2 cup cocoa
1 tsp vanilla
powdered sugar



Preheat oven to 350 degrees, grease a round cake pan. Melt the butter in a sauce pan, and stir in the other ingredients, making sure to turn off the heat before adding the eggs, or they will scramble. Mix well, pour into cake pan, and bake for 25-40 minutes. The cake should still be quite sticky in the middle when it’s done. Wait for the cake to cool completely before trying to remove it from the pan, as once again, it will be gooey. Dust with powdered sugar, and enjoy!!!!

That’s all I got for now, keep your fingers crossed that Alessandro decides to make his grand entrance soon!! I’m going to make Paolo fat if I keep having so much time to bake!

Ciao for now,

Kathleen

Surprise Party Fail

Still pregnant, guys. I am so over this already. At least Friday I finally have a doctor’s appointment. They don’t do the appointment every week thing here after 35 weeks, so I haven’t had one since then. Maybe they’ll have good news for me (at least some sign of progress would be nice). So there’s really not much going on these days. I don’t ever really feel like going out, especially by myself, so it’s almost the same as bed rest.. but you have to remember that it’s different here than the US. At home, to go to the store or whatnot, I can get in my car and just go. That’s not the case here. Just to go to class, I have to walk to the bus stop, wait for the bus, stand on the bus because of course no one gives a 9 months pregnant woman their seat, and then walk to class. Then sit in a wooden chair for 1 1/2 hours in a small, crowded room full of people who just don’t shower often enough. This is all well and good for a normal person, but at this point, I’m in a really “try-later” type of mood. My back is breaking, stomach stretched beyond imagination, and brain slowly shutting down; Italian class has been moved to the back burner. However, I did have a busy day yesterday that I’m suffering for today, so here’s a funny story to lighten the mood.

Next week (November 29) is Paolo’s birthday. I wanted to celebrate it in some way since most likely next week will be baby chaos (I hope at least), and I didn’t want his birthday to get lost in all the madness. So I collaborated with a couple of his friends, and we decided to have a nice dinner last night with some of our friends. Oh, and it was going to be a surprise, which is where the strategy had to come in. Yesterday was the perfect day since he was in Milan all day getting his American visa, and then had basketball practice at night. That way, I could prepare everything and clean without him being suspicious. Yes, he would be suspicious if I cleaned extra (no nesting here). So ANYWAYS. We had this grand plan, and I set about my day. I knew it would be stressful, because it was a lot to do in one day, especially in my present lazy state.

First of all, I must tell everyone that I am a horrible liar. I mean, I can’t keep a secret, so don’t even try. I crumble immediately under questioning. That being said, maybe a surprise party wasn’t the correct choice. But I tried, really. However... I went to the grocery store to get all the things I needed. Paolo has a car, but I can’t use it because I don’t have a license here, and also it’s a manual, which I tried once, and never again. So the bus was my only option. Once again, the bus is completely manageable up until about 37 weeks pregnant, when both your tolerance and energy take a nose dive. But I did it. It took me almost an hour and a half to get everything (because I’m moving like a snail), and then I left the store. This is where things went wrong. I usually go to a different bus stop, because the one closest to the grocery store is super crowded. But my bag was really heavy, so I opted for the close one. I called Paolo on my way there to see where he was. I expected him to be back in Pavia at his class by then, but he was still on the train back. I told him that I just finished my class and was heading home. He told me he was close, so I started to wonder if I should move, because my bus stop was by the train station, but thought, “nah, surely I wouldn’t run into him..”, because I NEVER HAVE. I got paranoid and started looking around at the entrance to the train station, and just as I turned back around, who should I make eye contact with? Of course, it was Paolo. He looked baffled, because I should’ve been on the other side of town, without grocery bags, etc. So I just stammered for a few minutes, then of course the whole story came out. Later, I realized I could’ve made something up and he would’ve believed me, but like I said, lying is not my strong point. So no surprise party. But we still had a lovely dinner with friends, so that was the important part. If you’re wondering our menu was:
1. Bruschetta
2. Pumpkin Risotto
3. Rosemary pork chops with green beans
4. Molten chocolate cake

And yes, it was all quite delicious, if I do say so myself. Today, I’m exhausted, however.

So the lesson learned is: Don’t count on me to plan a surprise party. A party, yes, there’s nothing I love more than organizing parties (and trips), but I can’t guarantee keeping a surprise.

Maybe next time I’ll have a baby? Not counting on it, at this point. But I do now have a ticket back to the US! yay!!

Ciao for now,

Kathleen

In Nine Months I've Learned...

Here are some nuggets of wisdom I’ve learned in the past few months that I found worth sharing:

1. Everyone has opinions and once you’re pregnant, they want to share them more than ever. This goes for basically everything related to pregnancy. People all around the world will give you parenting tips, lifestyle tips, etc., so be prepared. Some decisions you just have to suck up and make on your own, though. Were people right that moving to a new country at this point would be hard? Yes. Do I miss my family and friends more than they know? Yes. But I also don’t regret my decision. I did what I thought was best for me and my child, and though it is sometimes hard, I still think it is the best choice I could’ve made.

2. Priorities change.  I used to spend most of my money either on travel or my wardrobe. That has changed A LOT. Since being in Italy (the Mecca of the shopping world, mind you), I have not bought any shoes, except house shoes. How disappointing. Instead, I’ve bought baby clothes and things like diapers, a breast pump, and other weird things I would’ve never thought about buying.  But it goes deeper than just finances.. now, with every decision I make, I have to think about this other small person in my life. When I consider where to live, I have to think about schools; when I think about a trip I’d like to go on, I have to think about kid friendly activities in said place. Even when selecting a flight back to the US, there are a ridiculous number of things to consider when including baby, like baggage allowance, priority boarding, etc. No more just selecting the cheapest option.

3.The first step to being a good father is to be good to the mother. Since I’ve known Paolo, I’ve seen him grow from a boy into a man. He is far more mature than most of the guys I see here, and I’m so proud of him (he usually doesn’t read my blog, so I can say what I want). After he found out we were having a baby, he sped up his studies and finished his bachelor’s degree a semester early, as well as getting a job. He’s now working on his master’s degree, and making great progress. He’s helped me with everything in the past few months, from getting a permit to stay to going to childbirth classes with me.  I think for guys in general, pregnancy is a strange thing, because they can’t really do much besides watch. But what they can do is take care of Mom, and Paolo has done an excellent job of that. I’m so grateful to have him by my side, and can’t wait to see him with little Alessandro.

4. Complete strangers will feel comfortable saying ANYTHING to you while pregnant. Seriously. I don’t know why this is; do I have a sign on my forehead that says, “Go ahead, I can take it”? I mean, you have the usual things, like “How far along are you?”, or “Boy or girl?”, but then you have things like questions about how much you weigh, followed by detailed descriptions of how much they gained while pregnant, as well as any complications that they had. Or my personal favorite, there’s always their “friend” that went into labor in the car, or some other ridiculous story that they probably heard on TV. My response to the last woman who told me her friend had a baby in the car was that I hoped my labor progressed so quickly.

5. Take all advice with a grain of salt. Like I said in number 1, everyone has an opinion, or a way of doing things. My recent favorite is the neighbor who told me that it was dangerous to use a carseat in the first couple weeks of baby’s life, because they were too small. Yeah, for sure I’m taking that advice. I’ve seen the way people drive here; I’m not just holding him in my arms. It’s amazing how lax they are here on carseat laws. Not a risk I’m willing to take.

6. And lastly, you will find love and encouragement in places you weren’t expecting. Friends and family will really step up to take care of you when they know you’re dealing with something difficult or new. I’m so grateful for everyone in my life, even though I haven’t seen or even talked much to some in the past few months. You all really took care of me before I left, and I don’t know what I would’ve done without everyone. But what’s surprised me even more is the random words of encouragement I’ve gotten from people I barely know. I started this blog mainly as a way to update people close to me on what was going on, since I was writing the same messages and emails to people over and over. But the response I’ve gotten from other people is astounding, and it means so much to me that so many people take an interest in my life, and take time out of their day to write sweet notes to me. So to all of you, thank you very much, your words always come right when I need them.

In other news, I’m still just playing the waiting game. I’m almost 38 weeks, and my belly button finally popped out, so I’m really more than ready.  I’m waddling like a duck and having contractions periodically, so HOPEFULLY, my next post will be on the other side of motherhood.

Lastly, I’ll start doing a recipe of the week, because, hey, why not? So we’ll start with something I made last week, a sausage and vegetable roast. It was super easy, and pretty delicious if I do say so myself!

Sausage and Vegetable Roast
(2 servings)

About 1/2 lb of sweet sausages
2 potatoes
1 onion
2 carrots
1 apple
1 bell pepper
Olive Oil
Balsamic vinegar
Sea salt

Chop all vegetables. Place them in a roasting pan, and drizzle with oil, sea salt, vinegar, and about 1/2 cup of water. Brown the sausages in a frying pan on all sides, then add to the roasting pan. Roast in the oven at 350 for around 45-60 minutes, depending on the effectiveness of your oven (mine barely functions, it takes forever). Voila, you’re done! Bon appetit!!

Ciao for now,

Kathleen

A Much-Needed, Overdue Guide to Social Media Manners

I realize that this is about a day late, but after a whole day of ignorant Facebook statuses, it became obvious that someone needed to write a guide to how to behave during campaign season on social media. This is only the second presidential election we’ve had since the creation of Facebook, Twitter, and who knows what else. So I will try to be the Emily Post of social media, and do us all a favor.

Rule #1

Check facts. Both Republicans and Democrats posted things everywhere that were completely untrue. Extremist views will never be taken seriously by anyone with any common sense. Which leads to Rule #2..

Rule #2:

Realize that a facebook status is more than likely not going to change anyone’s mind. What it will do is lead to unnecessary arguments via facebook comments with people that you barely know.

Rule #3

Politics and Religion are the two topics that are generally considered off-limits with people you don’t know well. These are the topics that are most likely to cause argument, so no need to do it with people you don’t already know. With your family and friends, it’s a different story; they already know and like you. However, I doubt that most of your Facebook friends are so close to you. 

Rule #4

This is important. Win gracefully. If the candidate you support wins, there is a nice way to celebrate via social media. Usually this is something simple, like “Yay ____!” or just a simple, short celebration that their vote was for the winning candidate. It does not include things like rubbing in the win, or making tongue in cheek remarks about the other candidate. You already won, you should celebrate rather than trying to make the other side angry. This is called bipartisanship. Something we should all strive to learn more about.

Rule #5

Lose gracefully.  Because of the time difference, I missed the actual news coverage (I tried to stay up, really, but it was too late here). When I woke up early to check the results, I was appalled by the number of people who said that the world was ending, the people who said the US was going to hell, and the otherwise ridiculous exaggerations. It’s normal to be sad when your candidate loses, but seriously? It made me embarrassed to know people who would say such things.

Rule #6

Understand how the system works. In the US, we have a system of checks and balances. The president doesn’t have ultimate power; this is how we prevent dictatorships. We have the legislative and judicial branches as well; didn’t anyone pay attention in US history class? The president is more of a figurehead than anything. I’m not saying it’s not important, but the country will not collapse into Communism without the support of the other branches.

Rule #7

This one is just for everyone else’s sake. Please use correct grammar and spelling. It doesn’t take that long to spell check; just do it! You embarrass your fellow party members when you write grammatically incorrect posts about a candidate. And please, please, please don’t say “I could care less”. This is one of my biggest pet peeves; it’s a useless statement. “I could NOT care less” is what you were trying to say; “I could care less” simply says that in fact, you could care even less than you do, which is the opposite of what you’re trying to say.

Rule #8

This goes along with fact-checking, I suppose, but deserves its own rule. To  those of you who are moving to Canada, Australia, Europe, etc., do you know anything about their governments? They’re far more socialized than the US, with universal health care and many more welfare programs. In fact, the US is the most conservative first-world country in the world. Just food for thought.

Rule #9

This should go without saying, but apparently not. If you didn’t vote, don’t complain. Ever. You forfeited your right to choose. Also, I wouldn’t admit it online; you will lose all respect and credibility with most of us.

Rule #10

Most importantly, no matter who wins, you must accept that he/she is your President. I told Paolo as soon as I found out that I would far rather have Obama prove me wrong and do a great job, than to be right and have things worsen. No matter who had won, there would still be about 50% of people against him, but that’s democracy. We chose our leader; now it’s time for him to do his part of the deal.

Anyways, I hope that our country can prosper and do well, and more than anything, I hope that Americans will work together to succeed. We’ve become so split into our political parties that I almost feel like we’re behind enemy lines. If we want progress, we have to come together. I think that Romney had some really great ideas for economic recovery, and I hope that all of those ideas are not just completely ignored because they came from a Republican. He was a businessman, after all.

In the future, I hope that people will learn to be nicer to each other and respect the fact that people have different views. As nice as it would be for everyone to just like me, I realize that it can’t and won’t happen. Social media is a relatively new outlet for people to express ideas, and maybe in the future we can learn to control our words a bit more. Probably not, it’s human nature.. but seriously, you guys almost put me in early labor as I was reading through everyone’s comments this morning from both sides. Let’s all be mature, and remember that America is still a great, free country. Never forget all that our forefathers fought for, and never take these things for granted.

I promise this is my last political rant for awhile; there are too many other things on the horizon to talk about right now. Like the fact that this afternoon, I’m going for my consultation with an anesthesiologist for an epidural talk. That’s right, I gave in already. My doctor told me there was no reason to be a hero, and if it makes me feel better, do it. So there you go, I’m a big wuss. Also, she predicted he’ll come as early as November 15, so yes, that’s next week. No big deal. Paolo and I start childbirth class tonight (a little late, I know), which should be interesting since 1. it’s in Italian, I’ll understand niente, and 2. many things are done differently here. So we’ll see. And finally, here’s my latest homemade attempt at maternity photos, thanks Pinterest for the idea.





 

Ciao for now,

Kathleen

Life Update

I know, I’ve been slacking on my writing. In my defense, Paolo’s family was visiting all weekend, and I’ve been struggling. But I’m back, and so I’ll give a little life update.

First of all, in regards to my last post, there is a reason I don’t like to discuss politics. It’s because no matter what you say, your words can be misconstrued. I did state that I didn’t totally agree with the article I talked about, but simply that I thought the guy had some good points. I think abortion is a very deep issue, and in no way advocate it. I think too many politicians like to talk about it, but never actually do anything. Because of that, I think we as a population should start to question why it happens so much more frequently in the US than in other countries.  Maybe then we can find a solution to that problem, and thus reduce the abortion rate, at the very least.

Anyways, enough of that. On to happier topics. I went to the doctor last Tuesday, and good news! First of all, I didn’t gain any weight (yay me!), but the baby did, so he is a healthy 5.5 pounds, and is down and in position to arrive! If you’re keeping track, I’m 36 weeks, so getting close.. the doctor also said that based on his measurements and position, he may be a little early, so let’s hope for that!  I’m not sure how much longer my back/ribs can hold out, so I wouldn’t mind a couple weeks early. I mean, really, I’m probably doing ok for being in the 9th month, but even “ok” is still no party. I’m tired of asking people to do things for me, and not feeling like myself. Yoga and walking have helped my back, but still.. you can’t just gain 25 pounds and it not have some effect on your back.  Aside from all of that, I’m just ready to meet little Alessandro!

I keep hearing about how difficult the first couple weeks are after baby arrives, and I’m trying to prepare myself. I mean, I realize sleep is not going to be in the cards that much, but as far as I can see, newborns just eat, sleep, and poop, so can it really be so awful? I know I’m being naive, and all you veteran moms are laughing at me now, but let me just live in my little delusions for a couple more weeks. I’ll figure it out.

In other news, not much is going on. I have a lot of doctor’s appointments and such this week, so big fun ahead. In closing, I’ll include a recipe that many Americans attempt and overcomplicate, but is so easy you’ll realize you never needed a recipe. So here is how to make authentic Italian bruschetta:

Bruschetta

Toast as many pieces of bread as you want to make. Yes, just regular sliced bread will work fine.
Chop tomatoes (1 small one per person or 1 big one for two people) into small cubes, add a bit of olive oil, salt, and pepper, and mix.
Rub cloves of garlic (amount depends on how much you like garlic) over the toasted bread, and top with the tomato mixture.
Voila! That’s it, so easy!

Ciao for now,

Kathleen

Happy Election Season!!

I don’t like to talk about politics via social media. I find it completely counter-productive. My mind has never been changed or even remotely influenced by a meme or ranting Facebook status, so I don’t really see the need for all of that. And now, in the midst of election season, it’s impossible, even from a continent away, to escape the chaos. Many Italians have asked me my opinions, or who I’m voting for, so it’s obvious that this election is a big deal to the world. Also, my vote has already been sent in, so don’t try to campaign to me if you think you may change my mind. And, to all you people who say you aren’t voting because they’re both idiots, it’s you who is the idiot. Regardless of who you’re voting for, it is important to exercise your right, because as Americans, we fought long and hard for that right. Of course they’re idiots; they’re politicians. You won’t ever agree with one of them about everything, and they’re bound to screw up sometime. But to not have an opinion at all, or not let your opinion be heard (because everyone has an opinion, believe it or not), is just a poor attitude.

Anyways. Off my soapbox now. I say all of that to say that I found an article today that was quite interesting to me.  It deals with an issue that has been a hot topic this election season, and really, every election season: abortion. I found it interesting, because rather than just debating the right and wrong, as we have for so long, it offers a solution to the problem. As you can probably guess, I’m pro-life, and can’t say that I agree with everything in the article, but I can really relate to women facing unexpected pregnancies and think the author makes some great points. You can find the article at this link:
http://us.cnn.com/2012/10/29/opinion/frum-abortion-reality/index.html?hpt=hp_t2

If you don’t want to read it, here’s a brief summary. Basically, statistics show that the rate of abortion is directly related with economic status. Poorer women have more limited access to birth control, thus resulting in more pregnancies. Because children are expensive to raise, and the US doesn’t offer very generous maternity leave or other benefits to mothers, these poorer women are more likely to have abortions, either because they can’t afford another child, or they can’t afford a child at all. The author of this article compares the US with Germany and the Netherlands, which both have much better benefit packages for mothers, and also have much lower abortion rates. The abortion laws in these countries are not very restrictive, but by giving mothers some assistance, the incentive for abortion is much less.

Ok, now the reason this article is so interesting to me is that I’ve realized in the last few weeks how limited the US is with their motherhood benefits. We give food stamps to everyone, and have many government programs that are completely stupid and a waste of money, but we can’t give new mothers anything. We discussed this at one of my Italian classes last week. Each country represented by someone in the class went over their country’s laws, and out of Ukraine, Portugal, Egypt, Morocco, India, and a couple others I can’t remember, the US was by far the worst. Six weeks maternity leave is barely enough time to recover from having a baby, much less get to know the baby, and spend any time with him/her. Many mothers are forced to return to work simply because they have to. In Italy, mothers get 6 MONTHS maternity leave, and the father also gets some time, which can be used at once, or can be transferred to the mother to compound her time. Other countries offered even more; I think Ukraine was the most generous, but I can’t remember exactly how much was offered. The other women in my class were appalled at six weeks, they couldn’t understand how you could possibly breastfeed, or leave the baby with someone at that age. I have to say, it’s something I haven’t thought about until now, but it really is difficult in the US to work and have children. It’s almost like you have to choose one or the other to be great at, or just be mediocre at both. I’m very blessed in that I have parents on both sides that are willing to help out, but not everyone has that.

I know the author of this article is probaby not pro-life, but I like that he offers solutions to at least reduce abortion. It can never be completely eliminated; people will find ways, but if the number could be cut to 1/3 of the current number, it would be a great advancement. We can go back and forth for many years over when life begins, or whether unborn children have rights, but many babies will be lost in that time, not to mention the millions of women that will be emotionally damaged in the process. Or, in the meantime, we can offer alternate solutions to help women desperate enough to consider abortion as an option, and to put motherhood back in a positive light, even for working women.

I hope I didn’t offend anyone; it was certainly not my intention. I realize that abortion is a very complex issue, and I could talk for much longer about it, but in the essence of time, I just wanted to comment on that particular article. Remember, go vote!! It may seem like your vote is insignificant, but if everyone thought that way, what would happen?

Ciao for now,

Kathleen

Violent American on the Loose

If you see me make this face: RUN!

Have I mentioned that Italian people like to stare? Probably. Usually they stare at someone/something that they find either attractive or odd. Since I’m pregnant, I automatically fall into the odd category here. Since I’m young (ie, below 30), I fall into the “rare as Big Foot” category. So I get stares and also many kind words, such as, “Is she PREGNANT or really fat???” The jig is up Italy. At this point in my language learning, I understand most of what’s being said. Actually 2 months ago I understood that sentence. So shut up. I didn’t let it bother me in the beginning, but I’ve been super hormonal these past couple weeks, and am about to drop-kick the next Italian who whispers loudly in front of me. People should really be afraid of pregnant women; I’m huge and have some built-up rage. That was your warning, people of Italy. Don’t be surprised when you hear I’m in an Italian jail.

ANYWAYS. With having a child comes many important decisions; things I’ve never really thought of in my life. Honestly, I never thought about most child-related things before. I wasn’t the kind of girl who has a baby Pinterest board, I didn’t have baby names chosen by the age of 15 (or 22 actually), and the only reason I know about childcare is because I’m the oldest of four. That being said, I’ve spent more time in the last few months thinking and learning about babies than I have in the rest of my life.

Important Decision #1: Baby Name. For a girl, it would’ve been easier, I think. But finding out he was a boy was a game changer. I didn’t have any boy names even by 20 weeks pregnant. I think that most boy names are so common and overused; I wanted something different, with some meaning. Now, here’s where things got complicated: Paolo and I come from two different cultures, languages, etc. We had to find a name that was pronounced correctly, or close enough to correctly in both languages. May sound stupid, but no one here can say my name correctly. Including Paolo. Granted, I don’t say his name correctly either. Paolo’s choice was Ettore, which is the Italian version of Hector. Not only did I hate the name, but it would’ve been butchered in America. My favorites were Gabriel, Noah, and Rowan. Gabriel was ruined for me once I got here because of a certain person by that name. Noah sounds ridiculous when pronounced by an Italian, and they pronounce the “w” in Rowan like a “v”. So we decided to start from scratch. We finally came up with Alessandro, which is not super rare here, but I never heard of one in the US. I think it’s easy to pronounce, especially if you sing along to Lady Gaga’s “Alejandro”, and it’s also a strong name. It’s the Italian version of Alexander, which I think is a strong name, but too popular in the US. So, even though my family doesn’t like it, Alessandro it is. It also has great nickname potential, in my opinion.

His middle name will be James. The story behind that is actually pretty funny. Paolo told me when we first started dating that his middle name was James. I never questioned it, and when I found out we were having a boy, I thought to myself that James would be a good middle name, after his father. However, Paolo then informed me that of course his middle name wasn’t James, it had been a joke, no Italian parents would give this middle name to their baby.. so we thought it had a nice story behind it. So Alessandro James will be his name.

Important Decision #2: Birth plan? I didn’t know this existed before, I thought it was just a process. But now, you have to know what you want, blah, blah, blah.  I also thought that here in Italy, I wouldn’t get an epidural, so I got used to this idea. But then when I found out I could, honestly, I was a little disappointed. When you don’t have the option, you don’t have a choice but to do it naturally. Which somehow makes me feel like more of a woman. Maybe I’m a masochist? After some thought, I’ve decided to do it au natural, however, I am meeting with the anesthesiologist here in order to keep my options open if the pain ends up being unbearable. We’ll see.

Important Decision #3: All the little decisions that you never think of before. Breast-feeding or bottle-feeding? Cloth or regular diapers? Make your own baby food or buy it? Crib or bassinet? The list goes on forever.. so far, most of the things I’ve chosen are surprising to me. I never thought I would be so green as to choose cloth diapers, but the more I looked into it, the more appealing it was. I should save at least $1000, and you know, things like saving the environment. I know I’m in for laudry woes, especially here with no dryer, but we’ll see. Most of these things are personal choices that you make based on work situations, etc., so I don’t think there’s a right or wrong way to do it.

Important Decision #4: Parenting style. To be honest, I don’t think reading books or things like this can help that much. I think it must be something that just evolves over time. I’m trying to approach motherhood with no preconceived notions or expectations, just the ambition to raise my child to be a respectful, intelligent, and interesting man. Not asking too much, right? Once again, we’ll see. Every child is different, and I think to expect one parenting style to work before he’s even born is ridiculous.

There are a million other decisions that have to be made, but you get the point. And I have no doubt that a million more decisions lie on the horizon that I haven’t even thought of yet. C’est la vie!

Ciao for now,

Kathleen