Halfway Checkpoint

Today I am 20 weeks pregnant (halfway!), and I realized I haven’t written a blog post since finding out that I’m pregnant. So a quick update for all those who care: I am due May 2, we just found out that this baby is a girl (!), and it is true that each pregnancy is very different.

 

With AJ, the first few months are kind of a blur for me, I was very busy with finishing school, working in a restaurant, and then preparing to move to Italy. Other than my growing stomach and occasional morning sickness, I didn’t notice too many physical symptoms. This time was much more stable and easy from an emotional and financial standpoint, but physically was a nightmare from about week 6-16. Luckily we got in most of our Greek vacation before the torture began, but by the time we reached Santorini, I was just up for laying on the beach (and not a bad spot to do so!). After that, it was just all day, constant, morning sickness (what man named it that anyway?), and absolute exhaustion.

 

I am somehow very fortunate that we are going through a transition phase at work, which means that while management is more or less deciding my future, I don’t have too much to do. From a job security standpoint, not great; from a work-stress standpoint, wonderful.  I have a very supportive and understanding boss and colleagues, and in the German system, sick leave is given when you are sick (no worrying about number of sick days unless you cross 6 weeks per year). Pregnant women are extremely well taken care of in that regard here, so that has certainly made things easier.

 

Anyhow, the last 2-3 weeks have been much better, and other than my ever expanding stomach, shortness of breath, and constant hunger (making up for those 3 months, I think) I feel mostly normal. Baby E is growing perfectly, and has a big head just like her big brother. I have started feeling her move a lot, but we still haven’t felt any kicks externally. AJ is very excited most of the time, and asks me every day when the baby is coming out. He was admittedly disappointed to find out that it was a sister, but I’m sure he’ll come around. I was angry at my brother for being a boy right up until he was born, but I got over it.

 

This has certainly been an exciting time for us; last week AJ turned 4 (!), so we had a dino-themed week, with family coming to visit for both weekends. This week, we are preparing for a trip back to the US, for the first time in 19 months! AJ and I fly out Friday morning, and will be there for 3 weeks, so I am looking forward to some relaxing time visiting friends and family. I will admit that I have a list of foods that I have got to eat during my visit (Chick-fil-a, any decent Mexican food, and Johnny’s BBQ being the top of the list J ). I am pregnant, after all.

 

After I return to Germany, I actually only have a couple months left to work before my maternity leave begins (March 21!). I will then be on leave (partially paid) until at least May 2018, so plenty of time to bond with Baby E before heading back to work.  Then Paolo will take some paternity leave, so baby will be 14 months old when she starts daycare. Not too bad, huh? Yes, I pay a lot of taxes, but if you ask me these kind of benefits are priceless.

 

I hope that everyone has a very merry Christmas season, and a happy New Year!

An Open Letter from a Frustrated American Expat

Dear Fellow Americans,


Wake up. Seriously, what in the world is going on? More specifically, who are you people voting for Donald Trump? If you are one of these people, I have to ask: are you mentally stable? 


I have seen and read lots of articles about what is awful about the Donald, and far fewer about any redeeming qualities. Obviously, this leads me to the conclusion that his followers are most likely illiterate. I can't come up with a better explanation, this must be it (I've been to the Cullman Walmart, these must be the fans).


But enough with the insults, let me be real. From the other side of the world, it is downright embarrassing to be an American right now. I wish I could sugarcoat that statement, but that is the hard truth. It used to be the case that when someone discovered I was American, they would ask which state I came from, and if I liked it here, blah, blah. Now the question is first if I voted for Trump, and secondly, what's wrong with the people in my country? I have no good answer yet for the latter. I then have to admit that this election makes me quite happy to be here.


Don't get me wrong, I love my country. But when I see headlines everyday (yes, even here) discussing Donald Trump's latest stunt, I am embarrassed. And the media here is not nearly as polite as American media is (!), they are super condescending, and quite frankly, having a field day with the fact that big ol' America is so full of idiots that we came up with that guy to be a serious contender for the presidency of the most powerful nation in the world.


Of course, certain countries are loving it more than others. Italians are thrilled that they are no longer the only ones to elect (or almost elect) a bumbling buffoon (see Silvio Berlusconi). Most of Europe is simply laughing at us (not with us, AT us). I mean, really, can you imagine Donald Trump sitting down with Angela Merkel to discuss Russian intervention??? She will rip him to pieces (I, for one, cannot wait to see that one).


Since the GOP field narrowed to one, the tone is changing a bit, however. Everyone is still laughing, but it's becoming a nervous laugh. If this can happen in America, it can happen anywhere. Germany is currently dealing with an insurgent nationalistic party (AFD) as well as France (Front National). Aside from that, how the US reacts on foreign policy affects the rest of the world. Trump is untested, unscrupulous, and quite frankly, unsure. The man flip flops on his policies faster than the media can even report. Who knows what he really thinks?


I have seen so many conservatives bashing Trump in the past year, so now my question is: are you going to vote for him anyway? I truly hate seeing all these establishment Republicans now coming forward and backing him; way to stand by your convictions, guys. And evangelicals? I don't understand how a man like Trump can appeal to a true evangelical, this one is totally beyond me. We should never forget that neither political party is supported by the Bible. One must not vote Republican simply because the Christian status quo says that we should. Yes, there are certain topics that evangelicals say they can never support, but don't fool yourself into believing that Donald Trump is on your side in those fights. Or you can simply look at history and see that even conservative Presidents have done nothing to help in those fights.


So am I voting in this election? You betcha! It will be for whoever is against Trump. I will take Hillary or Bernie gladly over that moron. No, neither of them are perfect candidates either, but I refuse to watch my country become the laughingstock of the world. So I will do everything in my power to stop that, which is simply: vote. I am aware that my vote won't mean much in the state of Alabama (thanks, rednecks), but I will do my civic duty. I want to once again be proud of saying that I am American. Help me out, guys.


Ciao for now,
Kathleen

Guten Abend meine Damen und Herren

I wanted to post a little update on what's going on on our side of the pond, since it's been a while. We are in the midst of the Karneval/Fasching/Fasnet season here, which means parades and school parties.  Much to AJ's dismay, his dog costume from last year still fits, so he'll be a dog again (but I promised a new one next year).  

Alessandro is doing decently in his new kindergarten. His German skills have definitely improved since beginning there; I think it's because he's in an older class now (3-6), so they are speaking on a higher level. His social skills are still rough, unfortunately. Two days this week (out of the three days I picked him up), little girls have run up to me complaining of AJ hitting or biting them. In his defense, these girls do seem really annoying and bossy, but of course there isn't an excuse. We're working on it. The good news from him is that he is officially completely potty trained, including nights! Nights took a good while longer, but it suddenly just clicked, almost overnight. He still is completely obsessed with animals; it's all he talks about, but it makes him happy. As I type this, he is sitting in the bathtub, with a bunch of animals who are speaking German to each other. I know I mention it a lot, but his ability to speak all these languages is totally fascinating to me. He has three mother tongues now; that's incredible! I would really encourage anyone who's thinking about teaching their child an extra language; do it! It has to be natural though, I think, not just a here and there class. He even recognizes now when he hears people speaking a language he recognizes ("Mommy, she's speaking English!"). 

I, on the other hand, am stilllllll in German class. It's hard as an old person to learn a language. I am now in a B2 level class, meaning I can understand well, and communicate decently. Fluent is still a long way away, it seems.  Yesterday (Thursday) I had my first job interview in German. Well, it started in German. It went to English for a while, and then back again. As if an interview isn't nerve-racking enough, do it in another language. However, the good news is that on Wednesday I was officially offered another job, so that eased my nerves. Now I have to decide which job I want to do, but that is a difficult choice that I am happy to have after a year and a half of not working. Honestly, other than the beginning of my time here, and the past couple months, I haven't put tons of effort into finding a job other than sending my CV every once in a while.  But once I made some changes to my CV to make it "more European", with picture and all, I finally started getting responses. So that's the big news in my life. I'm still waiting on the contract to arrive, so I'll give details later. 

For the record, I am really enjoying living in Germany. I've had several people ask me lately when I'm moving back to the US... I don't know? Maybe never? Not because I don't love my country, but I also really like it here. I always give the excuse that Paolo doesn't want to move to the US, but that's really only one reason. I also made the conscious decision to move here, and have spent a year in an integration course, so it's kind of a lifestyle thing. Since my first international trip at the age of 12 (to Egypt), I've said I wanted to live abroad. Thank goodness we didn't end up in Egypt, like I used to want.  I can't say I'll never move back,  because it may happen some day. Hopefully it would be after my child-bearing years; I'm not giving up my one year paid maternity leave (per child!! And up to 3 years unpaid!). Also, not sure I want to give up 6 weeks paid vacation per year. Yeah, we pay high taxes, but in my opinion, quality of life is worth it. I also really enjoy how international the area we live in is; it's not uncommon to sit on the subway and hear four languages simultaneously. But despite having a very high foreign born population, Stuttgart is very safe. This is partly because people are very well integrated, and partly because there are lots of jobs, therefore, money. And most "authentic" Germans I've met have been very nice and welcoming. Of course, there are times when I get frustrated, but that's true with life in general. The best case scenario would be bringing all my loved ones here, but I guess that's having my cake and eating it, too (who came up with that phrase? Everyone eats cake if they have it!). Hopefully teleporting is not too far off in our future :)

Ciao for now,

Kathleen